Maybe
by all-time-dreamer
Summary: I can't do this without you, Kurt. I can't wake up knowing that you won't be next to me. I can't keeping coming home from work to an empty apartment, knowing that I have no one to love. And no one to love me. I need you, Kurt. I need you.


So, for some reason I'm in a really weird mood, and I've decided to write a really depressing story. Yay for tragedy?  
>Be cautious, there's some bad language. I apologise :  
>Read &amp; Review!<p>

* * *

><p><em>Well I lie on my bed all alone,<em>  
><em>While my broken heart whispers you name...<em>

* * *

><p>I can't even begin to explain to you why this happened. That's why I'm lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling. It needs painting, you know.<p>

It kind of hurts, I don't know. It's just numbness most of the time. Like I'm slipping away from everything and everyone, falling into blackness and I don't even care. Maybe you'd be there too. Or maybe not. You would've found a better place to be. With better company. Better than me.

I sometimes hope that you'd come back. I feel empty without you. And I know it's cheesy, but it's true. You were my other half, my life, my everything. I just sometimes wish I'd have stopped you from leaving that night. Maybe you'd be here now, with your arms wrapped around. Maybe I'd get a good nights sleep.

I saw Santana yesterday. Her and Brittany got married. They looked so... happy isn't even the word. You could see the love in their eyes. I felt that once. Maybe I'd feel it again, but I haven't since you-

I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything I did. Everything I said. For making you cry, scream, for not making you stay and calm down. You even threw the ring. Why did you throw the ring? If I could go back to that day, I'd stop you. Hold you and tell you that you were my everything. You still are.

Do you remember when I proposed? You had a rough day at work and you made the journey home fully expecting a chance to rant. You could have. I wouldn't have minded. As long as I could just fall asleep with you in my arms I wouldn't have cared what you did.

* * *

><p><em>So I hold on,<em>  
><em>And I stay strong...<em>

* * *

><p>Finn called. I don't remember the conversation. Something like 'How are you?' and 'Have you met anyone else?' How dare he? Of course I haven't. It was you, and only you.<p>

Burt's accepted me into the family. He lets me call him whenever I need to. On the day of your birthday, I cried that much that I didn't realise that someone was knocking on the door of my apartment. Our apartment. He took one look at the tears running down my cheeks and took me back to Lima. I spent the night in your bed. It smelt like you. Like vanilla, and that stupid skinny coffee that I came to love because your lips tasted just like it.

The Lima Bean hasn't even changed. Same baristas and everything. They recognised me. Asked me where you were. I said you just weren't. I guess the look in my eyes spoke volumes. They didn't ask again. They just gave me the coffee I ordered. I didn't realise until I took a sip that it was the one that you used to always drink. I do it all tthe time down.

* * *

><p><em>And I lay on the grass out in my yard,<em>  
><em>And I stare at the stars up above.<em>

* * *

><p>Why did this happen? Were we supposed to spend forever together. I supposed forever is over. Why is it over?<p>

* * *

><p><em>"Kurt, please! I didn't mean it, I'm sorry", Blaine pleaded, tears streaming down his face.<em>

_"You didn't mean it? Bullshit. You need space? Fine, whatever. You can have it", Kurt shrieked, whirling round on the spot to face Blaine with venom in his eyes._

_"No, please. I'm so sorry. Where are you going?" Blaine sobbed, moving forward to grab the front of Kurt's dress shirt._

_"I'm going to Rachel's. She actually respects me", Kurt removed Blaine's hands, and went to pick up his keys from the bowl next to the door._

_"Kurt, wait. I'm sorry. I don't need space. I need you. Please", Blaine ran to his fiance._  
><em>For a moment Kurt looked like he wanted to stay, but the mask went up once more and his eyes hardened.<em>

_"Call me when you've grown up, Blaine", he spat, removing the ring from his left hand and throwing it to the ground, "Or find someone else to marry"._

* * *

><p>Do you know what I did after you left? Cried. For four hours. In a heap i front of the door. I didn't have the energy to move to the couch. I just kept hoping that you would come back through the door, say you forgive me, anything as long as you didn't hate me. Did you hate me?<p>

Please don't hate me.

* * *

><p><em>"Mr Anderson?" A soft voice called into the waiting room.<em>

_Blaine was numb. He looked up to see a young nurse standing in front of him. She looked sympathetic. He didn't want that. He wanted Kurt to be okay._

_"Your fiance suffered serious head wounds, broken ribs, and a huge amount of blood loss. He's currently in a coma. We don't know when he's going to wake up, if he ever does. I'm so sorry", said the nurse once they were in the safety of the private hospital room._

_But Blaine barely heard her. He was focused on the broken boy in front of him. Bruises were scattered on his pale skin, red, black purple and blue, and a thick white bandage was wrapped around the older boy's head, concealing his chesnut locks. His torso was also wrapped up; the bandages visible through the cheap hospital gown._

_"Oh, Kurt", Blaine sobbed, collapsing into the chair next to his lovers bed. Taking his hand, he noticed how cold it was, and how it was squeezing back. It was limp, reminding Blaine of the severity of the situation._

_"I'll leave you alone for a minute", the nurse whispered, slipping out of the room silently._

_Blaine began to cry even more._

_"Oh, Kurt. I'm sorry. I should have stopped you from leaving. I would've if I'd have known. Oh god, please don't leave me. Please. Not again..." Blaine trailed off, the lump in his throat becoming too much to bear._

* * *

><p>I had the hospital call your parents. They flew over straight away. Burt was... in pieces, I'd say more than me, but I'm not sure that's possible. Finn was just angry. He yelled at me. At the nurses and at some poor old guy. I didn't even realise that he was yelling at me. I wasn't really paying attention.<p>

Carole managed to keep it together. I don't know how, or why for that matter. She could have cried. Everyone else did. I did, but I just wanted you to squeeze my hand, open your eyes. Anything, as long as it meant that you'd be okay.

* * *

><p><em>"I think you should all say your goodbyes, just in case..."<em>

* * *

><p><em>"No, No! He can't be! Try harder, he's not, he's not-" Blaine yelled, being held back in the grips of Finn and Burt, eventually sinking to his knees.<em>

* * *

><p>Please Kurt, don't do this. Please come back, even for one day so I could say goodbye. Tell you that it's not your fault, that I was being a dick and you were right. I'd tell you that I loved you more than anything, and if I could, I'd take your place.<p>

I can't do this without you, Kurt. I can't wake up knowing that you won't be next to me. I can't keeping coming home from work to an empty apartment, knowing that I have no one to love. And no one to love me. I need you, Kurt. I need you.

* * *

><p><em>"Kurt was amazing. He was my boo. He was the best friend a girl could ask for. He was always there for me. Whether it was a fashion emergency or a boy problem, he'd always come and help. He was the one that told me that even though I was lonely, I wasn't alone, that helped me so much. He was so honest, kind, compassionate. That's what I loved about him".<em>

* * *

><p><em>"Kurt was one of the best singers in Glee, and he was one of my favourite students. Every performance of his lit up the room. He could make people laugh, cry, sing or dance. He was amazing, and he made a really big impression at Mckinley. There's really no one like him"<em>

* * *

><p><em>"There are really no words to describe my son. He was witty, intelligent, funny, but with a heart of gold at the same time. I was so proud of him when he came out to me, it's a hard thing to. He was so brave, and even though the universe threw everything it could at him, he made it through. He reminded me so much of his mother. Kurt, I hope you're safe now. Tell you're mom I say hi..."<em>

* * *

><p><em>"Kurt was my everything. My best friend, my lover, my life. I remember the day I met him. He came to my school to 'spy' on our Glee club. He was a terrible spy, and I made sure he knew it. I saw how much he needed a friend, so I became one. I don't know where along the line that the friendship turned into love, but I'll always remember the look on his face when I told him how I felt. He looked like he didn't believe me at first, and I wondered if someone had made him think that way, but then I kissed him, and I vowed to make sure he knew that he was loved.<em>

_I proposed on the 25th April. The anniversary of when we got together. I was so scared he'd say no. But he said yes. And I'd never been happier._

_Kurt and I had our ups and downs, just like any couple, but at the end of the day, we both knew how much we loved each other. He gave me his heart and I gave him mine in return. He still has it now. I have a feeling it's going to be like that for a long while._

_Kurt, before I say goodbye for the last time, I just want you to know that I love you, and there's not a day where I don't think about you. I just want you back. Is that so wrong? Wherver you are, stay safe, and maybe wait for me? If you don't, just remember that I love you. I always will"_

* * *

><p>I suppose I should get up and out of bed. I can't remember when I last ate something that wasn't chocolate. I know you hated it when I ate junk food. Calories, calories, I know. You didn't need to worry, you were beautiful no matter what.<p>

I hope that one day we meet again. That we pick up where we left off. I hate the fact that we left it on an arguement, I'll never forgive myself for that.

I love you, Kurt.

* * *

><p><em>And they wonder if I've moved on,<em>  
><em>But I've not, <em>_And I won't, Now you're gone..._

* * *

><p>Argh, angst, tragedy. What is my life? I hope you all enjoyed this little shin dig, and I hope I didn't make you cry too much. If I did, sorry.<br>I'll leave you to guess what funeral speech belonged to what person :)  
>Ciao! xxxx<p> 


End file.
